The drugs still work

Good news from the Royal Marsden. My calcitonin count continues to fall.

This means that the chemo drugs are working. My gang of tumours is not increasing in size and have actually been bashed down into almost submission.  This is dandy news. The most dandy news of all.

The chemo drugs, Caprelsa, both giveth and taketh away. They kick tumours in the balls, but they make me feel pretty damn ruddy indeed.

So much side effects and so many compromises. I won’t go on about them, but I counted 35 out of around 100 possible side effects as my own, including the very frightening mini-stroke.

Big on the concern list now is the ‘anorexia’ effect, which has seen me lose a lot of love for grub and a decent whack of weight. I have always been rather porcine and have always enjoyed a sandwich or two. Not so much anymore though. Things taste funny and feel odd in the mouth. Grub I used to love now turns to dusty crud in my gob.

Cheese on toast is gone. Burgers are done. Toast is toast. Beans are has beens, and sweets are a sour experience. Ice cream is good, slush puppies are good. Porridge is good, and so is soup. However, pretty much anything that could assist me gain weight is as appealing as sucking on a stick of butter. I can see the purpose behind it, and the relative appeal, but it doesn’t half turn my stomach.

My dad offers a solution. He reckons that I should eat steak every day. This is the sort of thinking that I can get behind. After the hospital we immediately bought me three steaks and I went home to eat the first.

I can confirm to anyone that is interested – particularly in the beef business, that steak is, and has always been a very tasty thing.

Time will tell whether a much-steak diet is a good thing – Dad says that his dad – my grandad, ate a steak every day, and his innings was a strong one.

Poppy the dog is also a fan of the plan, and I suspect Charlotte will approve. I probably should have run my apocalypse-cow-farmer diet past the specialists at the Royal Marsden though.

Something that was mooted today was another brief holiday from the tablets to give my body time to spring back from their load.

I have in recent weeks and months become a rather anxious person. Usually relatively stoic I now have a tendency to slip into a panicky anxiety. This is not grand. I suspect it is the years of having cancer and the drain that it creates. But the experts, those wonderful people at the Marsden, think that it could be the tablets.

Discussed now, is a break from them. A second one. I had a recent two week break after having a range of stomach (bowel) issues, and felt pretty good by the end of it.

My doctor, and the wonderful Tara, say that a break would not be too much of a bad thing, and would not affect the ongoing effect of the tablets.

I look forward to their decision. I wouldn’t half mind enjoying some beans and cheese on toast for a change.